


could never define all that you are (to me)

by fxbricxtedrexlity



Category: Red Velvet (K-pop Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Explicit Sexual Content, F/F, Praise Kink, Slightly dubcon, Strap-Ons, Underage Sex, but smuttier smut will come when they're both of legal age, implied breast/suckling kink, irene and wendy are step siblings, it's the "lil sister's best friend" au, joy gets mentioned a few times in the first chapter, seulgi is wendy's best friend, yeri's vaguely mentioned in the first chapter
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-21
Updated: 2021-01-24
Packaged: 2021-03-11 00:47:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 18,228
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28206327
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fxbricxtedrexlity/pseuds/fxbricxtedrexlity
Summary: ::The summer has been kind to Seulgi. Most of her baby fat got shed, tank top showcasing toned arms and a slight farmer’s tan and she’s staring, she knows, and Seulgi’s moving forward as Seungwan shouts she’ll get her bag and then they’re ready to go.“Oh wow,” Seulgi breathes out when she’s close enough, bringing a hand up and Joohyun feels the cutting board digging against the low of her back. “, unnie, I’m the same height as you now! Just a few more years and I’ll pass you, huh?”She’s so close, smells like the outside sun and clean deodorant, and for someone who’s clearly experiencing the best side of puberty, the same childlike crinkle around her eyes is familiar. And Joohyun, well, Joohyun can’t tear her eyes away.All she can say is a small yeah, feels herself blush when Seulgi’s eyes bounce between hers, a smirk growing on her lips andwhen did she learn that?::seulrene. seulgi’s had a crush on her best friend’s older sister since the first time they met. too bad joohyun only sees her as her little sister’s best friend. that is until seulgi’s puberty happened.::
Relationships: Bae Joohyun | Irene/Kang Seulgi
Comments: 8
Kudos: 195





	1. :: chapter i ::

**Author's Note:**

>   
> a tad bit of warning before you proceed :)  
> this fic contains explicit sexual content, underage sexual activity, and slightly dubious consent  
> if some of the warnings put you off, please press the back button now :)  
> relationship between red velvet's irene and seulgi  
> i respect each and every one of the characters and real people i used in this fic
> 
> i guess that’s all, please enjoy :)  
> 

**::**

_could never define all that you are (to me)_

**::**

this story is for a friend :)

**::**

_when you move_

_honey, i’m put in awe of somethin’ so flawed and free_

_so move me, baby_

_shake like the bough of a willow tree_

_you do it naturally_

_move me, baby_

_so move me, baby_

_like you’ve nothin’ left to prove_

_and nothin’ to lose_

_movement; hozier_

**::**

_seulrene. seulgi’s had a crush on her best friend’s older sister since the first time they met. too bad joohyun only sees her as her little sister’s best friend. that is until seulgi’s puberty happened._

**::**

Seulgi was five when she first met Bae Joohyun.

Her hands were deep in the sand, the playground around her noisy as kids ran around. She’s busy making a sandcastle, waiting for Seungwan to come back with water so it can stay up just like her brother taught her to.

“Seulgi!” Seungwan screams, grinning wide and tugging along an older kid.

Seulgi’s still squatting inside the sandbox, eyes wide as the stranger smiles at her. “You’re pretty.”

“She’s my unnie!”

Back then, she was too young to realize that Seungwan changed her last name from Son to Bae, too young to know what a step-sibling is and what divorce and marriage are for. But she sits beside Seungwan in an itchy dress and a wooden bench inside the church a few months later, holding each other’s hands as Seungwan’s mom and Joohyun’s dad get married.

Bae Joohyun is beside her father, holding the rings, looking pretty in her pale yellow dress. Seulgi wonders what she looks like in white, clapping along and shivering in childish disgust with her best friend when the adults kiss.

Bae Joohyun is really pretty.

**::**

Seulgi was eight when she tries to teach Seungwan how to ride a bike.

“It’s the extra weight,” she points out when Seungwan wobbles a few meters, huffing and frustrated at her lack of balance.

“I can’t take off protective pads, Seulgi.” She waddles with the bike in between her legs, trying to pivot it back to its original position in front of their house. “Mom will kill me if I have bruises.”

Seulgi’s arguing _but that’s how you grow tougher skin_ when a car pulls up on the Bae’s driveway, their attention shifting and Seungwan loses her balance again, the cheap plastic of her knee pads and the cloth of gloves blocking most of the blow but it doesn’t deter Joohyun from quickly tearing out of the barely-parked car, rushing to her little sister’s side.

“Are you okay?” Her voice is worried, soft, and Seulgi stays at the side with her hands behind her back, feeling guilty somehow. Joohyun is pretty as always, visibly relaxing when Seungwan gives her two thumbs up and a bright grin. She looks at Seulgi then, smiling. “Nice to see you, Seul.”

The attention makes her blush, blinking twice. “Hi, unnie.”

“Kids! Help us with the groceries, please.”

Seungwan drags her, then, Seulgi making use of her two noodle arms and quickening her pace when Joohyun tries to take one from her.

“It’s alright, unnie, I got it.”

Joohyun nods, soft fingers gently touching Seulgi’s head, patting her once. “Thank you.”

Seulgi bites her lips, carefully toeing off her shoes by the entryway. Seungwan bumps her hips when they lean against the fridge, sipping on their juice pouches.

“You okay?” Seungwan asks, weirded out by her best friend’s sudden weird attitude.

Seulgi discretely watches as Joohyun goes up the stairs. She’s very pretty.

She shrugs. “Yeah, ‘m cool.”

**::**

Seulgi was ten, sleeping over the Bae’s like she always has on Friday nights for the past three years.

She snorts into the bowl of popcorn, dragging a finger over the bottom to catch more butter and the half-popped kernels when Seungwan snores loudly she wakes herself up for a moment and then dead to the world again. Good thing they’re just re-watching Home Alone 2. If it were a new movie, Seungwan would spend the better part of tomorrow morning apologizing while drowning herself in maple syrup.

A door opens just as Kevin breaks the glass window of the toy store, Joohyun’s head popping into the living room, hair wet and a towel slung over her shoulders.

“What’re you watching?” her voice drops to a whisper when she sees her little sister sprawled over the other side of the couch, drooling lightly.

Seulgi’s distracted by the sudden scent of Joohyun’s body wash, missing a beat before replying. “Home Alone. The second movie.”

Joohyun hums. “I’ll wake her, you can wash up if you want.”

“Ah, you don’t have to, unnie.”

She thanks that the lights are dim when Joohyun arches an eyebrow, feeling herself blush at having Joohyun’s eyes on her. “If we leave her here, both of you will end up sleeping on the couch.” She cocks her head to the direction of where she came from. “Go on, she’ll be upstairs when you’re done.”

A hand ruffles her hair as she passes by the older girl, Seulgi hurrying until she’s got her back pressed to the bathroom door. Steam’s still clinging against the mirror and she wipes it, cringing when she sees how red her face is. The water helps some, willing her blush to go away.

True to her word, Seungwan’s already tucked in her usual side of the bed, softly snoring. Seulgi can see Joohyun’s bedroom door is still open, taking a deep breath and bracing herself to knock on the door softly.

“Unnie?” A soft _yes?_ comes from inside, Joohyun brushing her hair by her vanity. “Thank you.”

Joohyun’s smile never fails to make her look pretty. “You’re welcome, Seulgi-ah.”

Seulgi nods, movements jerky, and stubs her toe against the door jamb on the way out. She sprints before Joohyun can ask if she’s alright, clutching her toe in the safety of Seungwan’s room, heart racing.

**::**

Seulgi was ten, just woken up over the Bae’s like she always has on Saturday mornings for the past three years, watching her best friend’s older sister as she cuts her pancakes, and realizes that she has a crush.

**::**

Seulgi was eleven when she learned that she likes it when Joohyun compliments her.

They’re over at her house for once, excitedly dragging Seungwan to the backyard with Joohyun in tow—to babysit them, she said, but they both know she’s curious about the treehouse too. She climbs up first, holding a hand out for the two sisters.

Seungwan coos and looks around the space, pointing at little details of where Seulgi painted on the walls. She preens, happy, and was expecting the same from Joohyun.

What she gets is a bright smile, the brightest she’s seen so far on the older girl’s face.

“You helped build this, Seulgi-ah?”

She nods, proud, showing off a thumb wrapped in a band-aid. “I have a battle scar to prove it!”

“It’s beautiful.”

Later, when the sun’s close to setting and the Bae’s have gone home, Seulgi paints _it’s beautiful_ in letters she thinks what Joohyun’s voice would look like if it had a font.

**::**

Seulgi was thirteen when she’s confronted with her sexuality.

She’s sitting on the Bae’s front porch. _I’ll handle it_ , her brother said, shooing her off their house with a ruffle to her hair. It’s barely four in the afternoon, Seungwan should be home soon. She’s too distracted with her own through, picking at a hangnail, when the front door swings open and Joohyun’s standing there with her body half-hidden behind the door.

“Seulgi-ah? Seungwan’s still at choir practice.”

She stands up, dusting off her shorts. “I know, unnie. Just wanted to get out of the house.”

The door opens more fully and she’s not prepared for the sight of Joohyun in shorts, feeling like she’s looking at something she shouldn’t. “Come on in, then. Did you and brother fight again?”

“No, he, uh…” she stalls, wiping her shoes by the welcome mat and unlacing them slowly. “, he had some friends over and he punched one of them.”

“What? Are you hurt?” Hands grip at her arms, turning her this way and that, inspecting. Seulgi shakes her head along with masking the weirdness she’s feeling just by having Joohyun close to her. “Why did he do that?”

“It’s something stupid. I told him not to but he still did it anyway.” Joohyun leads them to the kitchen, announcing that she’s fixing Seulgi a snack. Seulgi stammers, nervousness bleeding into her limbs as she flushes bright red.

“Are you sure you’re alright?”

“Ye—yeah,” she choked out, alert when Joohyun started moving closer. “I swear.” _I’m okay so please don’t come any closer_ , she wants to say.

Joohyun still does anyway, tucking her hair behind red-tipped ears. Her shirt moves, stretching over an enticing collarbone and Seulgi sees it.

A red bruise.

She’s about to point it out when a door shuts upstairs, feet heavier than she’s used to coming down the stairs and a boy pops his head around the corner, a backpack slung over one shoulder, and making his way towards Joohyun who accepts a kiss to the cheek like it’s normal.

Maybe it _is_ normal.

“See you tomorrow,” he tells Joohyun and Seulgi raises an eyebrow. He gives a two-fingered salute to Seulgi, swaggering out the front door in a familiar way that Seulgi wonders how many times he’s done it.

“Who was that?”

“My boyfriend.”

Well.

“Boyfriend,” Seulgi repeats the word, tasting so foreign in her mouth especially in the context of Joohyun. Something twists in her gut, ugly and green and bitter.

“Yeah,” Joohyun agrees, thankfully not repeating _boyfriend_ again. They’re quiet, Seulgi digesting that piece of information. Was she supposed to say congratulations? Good for you? What about me? Joohyun speaks up before she can say something she’ll regret. “Alright, tell me what _really_ happened. WIth your brother.”

It’s either tell Joohyun or go back to the topic of her having a boyfriend. Seulgi sighs, settles down firmly on the stool, realizing that there’s no way out. She fiddles with her thumbs, nervous again.

“I think I like girls.”

Joohyun’s face doesn’t betray much. “Oh?”

“Yeah, some of the girls in my class keep on talking about how they imagine their first kisses and how attractive some of the boys are.” It’s been the main topic during break time for weeks now, Seulgi and Seungwan usually just listens in and not contributing much to the topic. Today, Seulgi opened her mouth. “And I told them I can’t relate to that.” She shrugs her shoulders, looking away from Joohyun and towards the living room. “They told me I must be a lesbian. Asked what it was and, well, I know now. Rumors reached my brother’s friends and they kept asking me about it when they came over. He punched one of them, telling them it’s none of their business. My parents are trying to talk to the other parents but they said it’s better if I were out of the house for a while.”

“I see,” Joohyun waits if there’s anything more, clears her throat when Seulgi just continues avoiding her eyes. “Does Seungwan know?”

“The rumors? I don’t know. She doesn’t care for that stuff. But me liking girls… you’re the first one to know.”

The sound of slippers reaches her ears and Seulgi turns in time to see Joohyun’s proud smile before leaning in to kiss her cheek. Seulgi stiffens in her seat, brain short-circuiting.

“Thank you for trusting me,” Joohyun whispers softly, so close and in her space, clouding her mind.

“It’s, uh, it’s nothing.”

And as if her brain needed any more frying, Seulgi gets an uninterrupted view of Joohyun biting her lip, thinking for a moment. She just stares.

“If it makes you feel better,” the older girl starts, tone reassuring. “I’m bisexual.”

“What’s that?”

Joohyun laughs with no sound, amused. “I like boys _and_ girls.”

The information sinks into Seulgi like tar, slow and sticky.

_Oh._

“Seulgi!” A voice booms from the front door, Seungwan turning the corner and fixing her with an exasperated glare. “You left your shoes in the way again!” 

Joohyun slips away that moment, pressing a kiss to her little sister’s hair, announcing that she’s got homework to do, and smiles at Seulgi when she’s halfway up the stairs.

**::**

Seulgi was thirteen when she told her best friend about her sexuality.

“I still love you,” Seungwan tells her fiercely, hugging her tight on top of Seungwan’s yellow printed sheets.

“I know,” she says because she truly believes that no matter what, Seungwan will accept her.

She can’t see her best friend’s face so Seulgi didn’t expect when Seungwan suddenly talks against her shoulder.

“Are you also going to tell me that you have a crush on Joohyun-unnie?”

Everything stops.

“Wha… what? I don’t—“

Seungwan disentangles their limbs, glaring at her with a pout. “You think I don’t know? After all these years?”

Seulgi fumbles, grip tightening against the soft sheets. “I don’t…” She eventually sighs, resigned. “It’s not weird?”

Her best friend shakes her head, hair flopping across her forehead. “It’s just a crush, nothing’s wrong with that.”

Seulgi nods, doesn’t know she’ll be repeating that line for years to come.

**::**

Joohyun was eighteen and it was in the summer before she left for college when she went the longest without seeing Seulgi around.

Her little sister’s best friend is always at their house one way or another, her shoes have a permanent place in the shoe rack, her own mug in the cupboard, and a toothbrush beside Seungwan’s. And she stares at it, going outside the bathroom to see her little sister eating on the couch, pointing out that Seulgi hasn’t been around for a while.

“Seul?” Joohyun admonishes Seungwan for trying to speak with her mouth open, holding a finger up as she chews and swallows. “She’s visiting her cousins. Her parents sent her there, saying to spend time in the countryside before she starts high school.”

And, well, she’s not prepared for when Seulgi came back.

**::**

Joohyun was eighteen, a month before she’s supposed to leave for college when she started seeing Seulgi more than just her little sister’s best friend.

She’s helping her mom in the kitchen, chopping the vegetables, and Seungwan’s pacing around the house like a madwoman, panicking, and carefully listing down the school supplies she’ll need to buy. She shakes her head, relaying to their mother that she already told Seungwan last night that _nobody will care if you use a different pen from middle school_.

“Wannie, honey, where are you going again?”

Seungwan pops into the kitchen, steals a carrot slice. “The mall. Seul’s picking me up.”

Joohyun laughs. “It’s just high school, don’t get too worked up about it.”

“Unnie, you’re only saying that because you already graduated,” a voice chimes in, familiar and not at the same time.

Seungwan squeals, hugging her best friend and their mother wipes her hands on her apron, tells Seulgi it’s so nice to see her again.

The summer has been kind to Seulgi. Most of her baby fat got shed, tank top showcasing toned arms and a slight farmer’s tan and she’s staring, she knows, and Seulgi’s moving forward as Seungwan shouts she’ll get her bag and then they’re ready to go.

“Oh wow,” Seulgi breathes out when she’s close enough, bringing a hand up and Joohyun feels the cutting board digging against the low of her back. “, unnie, I’m the same height as you now! Just a few more years and I’ll pass you, huh?”

She’s so close, smells like the outside sun and clean deodorant, and for someone who’s clearly experiencing the best side of puberty, the same childlike crinkle around her eyes is familiar. And Joohyun, well, Joohyun can’t tear her eyes away.

All she can say is a small _yeah_ , feels herself blush when Seulgi’s eyes bounce between hers, a smirk growing on her lips and _when did she learn that?_

“Are you okay, unnie?” It’s to pull a rise out of Joohyun, she knows it, but somehow the teasing makes Joohyun feel weird. A dangerous kind of weird.

Seungwan comes barrelling in the room, now a few inches shorter than her best friend, and drags her out the door with the force of a hurricane.

“We won’t be out too late!”

That was a moment, Joohyun’s sure of it, but she pushes it far back in her mind because _no_ , she’s not attracted to her little sister’s best friend.

**::**

Seulgi was fifteen, a month away from starting high school, when she realized that this might be her last chance with Joohyun.

“She’ll live near her university.”

“Really?”

Seungwan nods, carefully scooping a spoonful of her frozen yogurt. “She’s leaving in a month. Ah, speaking of which, with the house going on a renovation, Mom was wondering if we can plan her goodbye dinner over at your house?”

“Yeah,” _goodbye dinner_. “Sure, I’ll ask my parents.”

As they walk back home, Seungwan asks her: “Do you still have a crush on my sister?”

The question caught her off guard, momentarily wanting to shrug it off and deny. But this is Seungwan. Even though she’s the sister, she’s also Seulgi’s best friend.

“Yeah.” The Bae’s driveway comes into view, Joohyun sitting on the front steps, waiting for them.

Seungwan waves at her older sister, looking back at Seulgi with a grin. “I was just wondering. You’ll start high school, she’ll start college, you might not see each other for a while.”

A crinkle forms in between her eyebrows, eyeing her best friend skeptically. “What are you getting at?”

Seungwan shrugs. “Just saying that if you want to shoot your shot, this might be the last time you could.” Then she skips ahead of a baffled Seulgi, giving Joohyun a one-armed hug, the front door closing loudly behind her.

“Thanks for walking Seungwan home,” Joohyun tells her when she’s close enough, standing on the last step and taller than Seulgi for a few inches.

“No problem,” Seulgi says, grinning cheekily at the height advantage. “That’s unfair, unnie.”

“What is?”

“I’ll still grow, you know? Time will come where you can step there and I’ll be eye level with you. Probably even taller.”

Joohyun cocks an eyebrow, crossing her arms just below her chest and Seulgi tries not to react with how it enunciates the shape of her breasts underneath her shirt. “Since when did you get so cocky?”

Feeling reckless, Seulgi yanks her forward until Joohyun narrowly misses stepping on her toes. “The summer before high school changes a person, haven’t you heard?”

They’re in the same space, so close, and Seulgi can finally see how beautiful Joohyun’s eyes are right in front of her, at eye level. Wide and surprised, lips parted from the unexpected action.

She’s beautiful.

Seulgi lets her go when she pulls away, a cute blush high on her cheeks making itself known when she stepped under the bright light of their porch. Seulgi treasures the way she stammers an excuse to get back inside the house, all high-pitched and jerky movements. It fills her with warmth and something enticing.

**::**

Seulgi was fifteen when she first learned how to touch herself, not surprised when someone’s on her mind when she does it, can’t help it, can’t stop.

**::**

Seulgi was fifteen, Joohyun was eighteen, and it was Joohyun’s last night before she left for college.

Mrs. Bae has been over at the Kang’s since this lunch, Seungwan holding her fort at their own house and Seulgi’s been watching her bake for the better part of the day. Joohyun’s been in her room all day packing last-minute items, she assumes.

Seungwan’s been quiet too, despite her attempts at being chip when Joohyun comes down every once in a while with another box to add to the pile by the front door, Seulgi can see it’s going to be an adjustment to not have her older sister around.

Seulgi bumps her hips with her best friend, aiming for a reassuring smile.

“Need help?”

They bake side by side, trying not to give too much thought to the noises of furniture being moved around upstairs.

**::**

Joohyun was eighteen, Seulgi was fifteen, and it’s Joohyun’s second time inside Seulgi’s treehouse.

“Huh,” they needed to sit as soon as they made their way inside, Joohyun staring down the small ladder they climbed to get up. “, I can’t believe I was scared of going up here whenever you invited me. I always thought it was higher up.”

The treehouse is barely five feet off the ground, just the two of them. Seungwan and their parents had to drive her home immediately when she had an upset stomach after dinner and Joohyun could’ve gone with them if it weren’t for the sulky mood that hung over Seulgi like a shadow.

“Really? That’s the reason why you never hung out with us here?” Seulgi asks from the darkness of her side of the treehouse, legs bent so she can give more room for Joohyun.

“Yeah,” she agrees to the darkness, barely making out the lines of Seulgi’s suddenly pinched expression. “Are you okay?”

Seulgi’s eyes catch the light from the backdoor light, emotions hard.

“Unnie,” her voice sounded pained, leaning forward. “Unnie, I like you.”

Joohyun wants to play it off, wants to laugh goodnaturedly and maybe if she blinks, she won’t have to see the painful honesty in that confession. She’s flustered, wanting to tear her eyes away from Seulgi but _can’t_.

“Seulgi-ah,” she starts slowly, like approaching an animal that might bolt at a moment’s notice. “, you don’t…thank you but I don’t see you like that.”

Seulgi moves, desperation leaking from her bones, until she knocks Joohyun over. She’s got an arm under the older girl to soften the blow until she’s leaning over, breath fanning hotly over Joohyun’s surprised face.

Her lips taste like salt, Joohyun belatedly realizes that Seulgi’s crying, stunned and pinned on the hard floor of the treehouse. The weight on top of her is unyielding, scary, and she doesn’t kiss her back.

“Please,” Seulgi whispers against her chin, voice wrecked with emotion, tears dropping wildly down her cheeks and to Joohyun’s. “Just tonight, please. I can change your mind about me, please.”

It grips at Joohyun’s heart, hard and impossible, and it prompts her to look to the side and tries her best to be as boneless as she could. Seulgi sighs, reverent, making quick work of the buttons of Joohyun’s shirt and shoving cold hands under her skirt.

She felt like she was out of her body the entire time, shivering whenever Seulgi’s clumsy and inexperienced hands swiped a little too hard on her clit, teeth biting painfully against her nipple, and she shuddered into reality when a breeze passed. 

“No,” she closes her thighs, pushing the hand away, still pinned on the floor. “Seulgi-ah, no.”

Seulgi’s eyes are wild, like she can’t really see Joohyun in front of her. “Do me, then. If you don’t want to, then do me instead.” Her forefinger is still shining with Joohyun’s slick as she tries to pop open the button of her shorts, smearing against the fabric of her zipper, only stopping when a hand cradles the back of her head and just holds her.

They both cry, Joohyun thinks. She soothes the tension in Seulgi’s bones by just holding her close, trying not to react when the younger girl buries her face between her breasts to suckle at the skin, doing so for comfort.

She cries, and cries, and cries.

**::**

Joohyun was eighteen and Seulgi was fifteen when they stopped talking.

“You can’t mention this to anyone,” she says shakily, re-buttoning her clothes. “God, Seulgi, what were we thinking? I’m eighteen and you’re still a minor. I could go to _jail_.”

Throat closed up, Seulgi just nods, holding her knees tighter against her chest. “I won’t. I’m sorry.”

It’s the same four words she’s been repeating the past few minutes and Joohyun tries to smile at her, knowing it must end up looking more like a grimace.

“Good luck with highschool.”

“I’m sorry.”

Joohyun nods and then she’s gone.

**::**

Joohyun was twenty and it’s the longest she hasn’t come home.

“I’m sorry, Wannie,” she sighs, phone in between her ears and shoulder, slipping her shoes on and double checking if she has everything she needs for another day in the library. “Why don’t you go out? Find something to do.”

“Can’t,” came the muffled reply from her sister, no doubt putting a pillow on her face for dramatic effect. It pulls a smile out of Joohyun, at least, nice to know some of her little sister’s habits didn’t change. “I’ll be too bored to go out by myself.”

This gets her attention. “Why not go with Seulgi?” It’s the first time she mentioned the younger girl’s name in a while, finding it weird that they haven’t really talked about Seungwan's best friend in the past few months.

Seungwan groans. “We went to a party last night and I still feel hungover so I’ll probably just hang at home. And Seul still hasn’t replied to me so she’s probably dead to the world. Or still in bed with Sooyoung, I don’t know.”

“Sooyoung?”

“A freshman Seulgi’s been… dating, I guess?”

“Dating,” she repeats, snapping herself out of it before she can think too much of it. “How about you, you dating anyone?”

The conversation spirals from there, thankfully away from Seulgi, Joohyun talking to her younger sister until she reaches the front steps of the library.

“I was thinking of coming home,” she says, just before they said goodbye.

“Oh?” Seungwan’s voice is noticeably delighted and yeah, maybe it’s time to come home.

“Just for the summer, maybe.”

“Can’t wait!”

**::**

Seulgi was seventeen when her best friend caught on.

“Something happened.”

She’s distracted, texting someone on her phone and changing to Sooyoung’s messages. No new message since last month. “Happened with what?”

Deft fingers pluck her phone and she’s so used to Seungwan doing this that she’s not even mad, just leans back and waits for her best friend to stop glaring at her and to begrudgingly give her phone back.

“With you and Joohyun-unnie.”

She stiffens, her body rigid with just the mention of her name. “Nothing happened,” she denies quickly, twisting her phone and wishing someone would text her right now.

“Something happened last summer,” Seungwan insists, doing the puppy eyes she knows always work on Seulgi. “Tell me? I’m your best friend and frankly, I’m scared to ask her even though she’s my sister.”

“No,” she lies through gritted teeth, feeling her insides churning at lying with Seungwan. “, nothing happened.”

Seungwan sits up straight, looks her in the eyes. “Okay, let’s say nothing _did_ happen.” Her voice is hard, taking no nonsense. “, then explain to me _why_ you never hang out with me at the house when unnie’s home from college and why you suddenly decide to sleep with half of the girls in town. In the first half of freshman year.”

_To forget her._

_To be better._

_Because I still like her and if I pretend it’s her I’m touching without being near her, it might be better that way._

Her face must look weird. Or pained. Because Seungwan suddenly softens, hugging her fiercely.

“I know I’ve been telling you that it’s just a crush,” Seulgi starts, feeling warm hands make soothing gestures against her back. “, but I really don’t think it’s still just that, Wannie.”

**::**

Seulgi was eighteen, Joohyun was twenty-one, and it's been three years since they last saw each other.

Papers are sprawled all over the Bae’s dining table, Seulgi and Seungwan both hunched over their laptops and quizzing each other for possible college entrance exam questions when the front door opens and in comes Mr. Bae with two suitcases in tow.

Seulgi sees her first, ducking her head and thankful she’s got her back against the hallway, wishing her voice is quiet enough as she glares at her best friend.

“You didn’t tell me your sister’s coming home!” She hisses, huffing when Seungwan just shrugs, a smug grin on her lips as she stands up.

“Must’ve slipped my mind.”

“Like hell it did.” She just wants to make herself small, trying not to draw any attention to herself but who was she kidding?

“Seulgi-ah?” A voice asks just behind her and she knows she can’t escape this.

She pushes her chair back, making eye contact with Joohyun as she stands up and _oh_. Seulgi feels a childish joy spark inside of her when Joohyun had to tilt her head up to meet her eyes.

“I’m taller than you now,” Seulgi points out unnecessarily, relishing in the roll of eyes Joohyun gives her.

“I see you’re still as childish as ever,” she snarks, turning to hug Seungwan. “I’ll go rest for a bit, you don’t mind, do you?”

Seungwan seems to be having the time of her life, rolling her weight against the balls of her feet. “Nah, you’re cool. Go rest!”

Seulgi elbows her best friend when she rounds the table to get back to her seat. “You’re an ass.”

She seems unfazed. “You’re welcome.”

**::**

Joohyun was twenty one and she’s absolutely _not_ jealous of Sooyoung.

She, unfortunately, saw them together at the mall earlier, somehow able to make the chipped floor look like a runway with how well they look together. And Sooyoung has a hand hooked inside Seulgi’s back pocket. Gag.

“Are they always like that?” She asks her little sister, uncaring if she jostles her precarious position at the other end of the couch.

“Sooyoung and Seulgi? They were worse before, trust me.” Seungwan crinkles her nose, silently glancing over as she assesses the situation. “Why’d you ask?”

She hides a pleased smile when Joohyun stabs a spoon in the middle of the harmless ice cream tub. “Nothing it’s… I thought you said Seulgi’s not dating anyone?”

“Sooyoung and Seulgi used to date on and off, in between sleeping with other people. But they broke up for good, like, a year ago and Seulgi stopped sleeping around.” Seungwan accepts a mouthful of ice cream to stop herself from blurting out _because she finally admitted to me and herself that she’s in love with you_. “They’re really good friends now, though. Sooyoung’s cool and in a very monogamous and loyal relationship with another junior.”

“Her hand looked _too_ friendly to me,” Joohyun mutters darkly, stabbing another spoonful, and okay, maybe Seungwan needs to interfere _once_ more.

She snatches the ice cream from her older sister, swatting her hands when she tries to get it back.

“No,” she says firmly. “, I’m not letting you maul this poor ice cream all because you’re jealous of Seulgi’s ex.”

Joohyun’s eyes grow wide. “I’m not—what? I’m not jealous.”

Seungwan’s unimpressed. “Mm, right, and I’m your biological sister.”

“You know I hate that when you use that.”

She arches an eyebrow. “No changing topic. How long have you liked Seulgi?” Joohyun is unmoving, eyes staying resolutely at the television. “Unnie.”

“Oh, fine!” Joohyun throws her hands up, face scrunched up like a petulant child, before crossing her arms and pressing herself tightly against the arm of the couch. “A few years ago, I think.”

“You think?” When it’s decidedly clear that Joohyun won’t say anything more, Seungwan pokes her thigh with a toe. “I’m her best friend, I’m your sister, this is a really weird place to be in right now but I’m telling you to shoot your shot. It’s your move to make, unnie.”

**::**

Joohyun is twenty-one, Seulgi is eighteen, and they finally get their shit together.

She feels weird, closing the front door and leaving behind Seungwan’s stupidly supportive face. Joohyun sighs, re-tracing the familiar steps to the Kang's house two blocks away. True to her intel, there’s no car on the driveway, Seungwan mentioned there’s an away game for Seulgi’s brother’s baseball and that the Kang’s drove him.

“Meaning,” Seungwan manages to pull a facial expression that’s both suggestive and disgusted. “, she’ll be alone for the whole weekend. Just spare me the details in case something _really_ good happens. If things turn ugly, I’m just here. I’ll hear Seulgi’s side after I make sure you’re okay.”

The walk is long enough for her to contemplate if this is a good idea and short enough that she still hasn’t come to a conclusion when she’s already knocking on the front door.

A head pops from behind the curtain beside the front door, Seulgi no doubt surprised.

“Unnie,” she sounds breathless, wearing a tank top and sweatbands on both wrists. “, what’s up?” The door is opened wide nonetheless, Seulgi motioning for her to come inside and she sees a yoga mat in the living room as well as weights. “Ah, yeah, sorry if I’m sweaty. I was working out.”

“No, it’s fine, I’m—“ _leaving anyway_ , she wants to say. But what comes out of her mouth instead is: “I just wanted to talk to you. If it’s alright. I can totally come back another day if—“

Warm hands clasp at her bicep, Joohyun blinking owlishly before meeting Seulgi’s eyes. She looks amused.

“It’s alright,” she gestures for the couch, asking if she wants anything to drink, and comes back with two bottles of water. “, what did you want to talk about?”

_It’s now or never_.

“Can we talk about that time?”

There’s no further need for clarification, the air in the room suddenly drops and Seulgi’s whole spine stiffens, unmoving.

“Please,” Seulgi shakes her head, looking up at the ceiling to keep her sudden tears at bay. “, please, I’m _so_ sorry for doing that. I… I was young and _dumb_ and—“

“Do you still like me?”

“—I’m, wha… what?”

Joohyun folds one leg underneath her thigh, encroaching on the younger girl’s space, eyes serious. “Do you,” she repeats, frustration bleeding in her words because she needs to _know_. “, still like me?”

Seulgi looks lost, unfocused, her lips barely forming a _yes_ until Joohyun’s kissing her. It’s quick, chaste, and Seulgi chases her when it’s over, stopping only when she feels a hand cupping her cheek.

“I like you too. Even before that happened.” She takes a deep breath, softening when Seulgi’s attention is focused on her, leaning against her palm warmly. “I didn’t… I didn’t want to talk about it because you were so young and I’m three years older and it just _can’t_.”

“Back then.”

“Back then, yes.” She agrees, lost in the way Seulgi’s entire demeanor changes. Confident, sure of herself.

“And now?”

“And now,” she’s barely aware that she’s shaking, holding her whole soul back from reaching out. “, now we can try.”

**::**

Joohyun was twenty-one, Seulgi was eighteen, and they really need to rehash what _trying_ means.

Because currently, they’re decidedly not taking anything slow.

Joohyun gasps, grabbing handfuls of Seulgi’s bear-printed bed sheets, back arching beautifully and up against the wet heat of Seulgi’s mouth sucking feverishly against a pert nipple. Two fingers are deep inside of her, curling sinfully and with a single purpose as they hook expertly, beckoning wrecked moans from Joohyun’s mouth.

“Oh my _god!_ Yes, please please _please_ ,” she mouths at a pillow, already feeling her orgasm licking at the base of her abdomen, insistent and building. And here she was thinking half an hour ago that maybe she’ll be the one to lead.

Clearly, Seulgi doesn’t need any instructions.

“Stay still.”

Joohyun lolls her head, feeling warm skin slide against hers and— 

“ _Fuck!”_

A tongue laps against her mess, before diving in, and yeah, Seulgi’s sheets are bound to be ruined after this.

Her orgasm is so close, it’s right _there_ , but Seulgi pulls back, her whole hand splayed over Joohyun’s heaving stomach and she feels her insides clench when two wet streaks are left on her skin when Seulgi moves to get up.

A drawer opens and Joohyun wriggles against the sheets, only stopping when Seulgi pins her with a pointed glare and a gruff _behave_ as she works with the harness and slipping the toy until it settles solidly against her hips. 

“On your knees.” Joohyun obeys silently, a weak moan escaping when she’s spread even wider, the blunt head of the strap-on nudging right against her entrance as Seulgi moves her. “Traffic light system. Color?”

“Green.”

She takes half of it in one straight thrust, wailing at the sudden fullness but it feels so _good_. Seulgi feels solid behind her, two hands gripping her hips tightly and setting the pace, not letting Joohyun grind backward and keeping her at bay, moving in slowly until she’s buried to the hilt.

“You feel so tight,” Seulgi sounds like it’s punched out of her, hot breath on Joohyun’s back as she momentarily takes a moment to savor it.

“For you,” Joohyun babbles, already grinding until her ass is pressed tightly against straining thighs, unaware of the effect of her words on Seulgi.

One moment it was still, the next Seulgi’s absolutely _pounding_ her. Hands on her hips move up up _up_ until they settle on her shoulders, pulling her back roughly against the toy and each moan knocked out of Joohyun, feeling her knees slip against until she can grasp at the headboard as she takes it.

“Unnie,” a drop of sweat rolls down Seulgi’s neck, drunk in the way Joohyun looks before her. “, you look so beautiful, unnie.”

She’s fascinated as skin ripples, Joohyun’s entire body singing as her orgasm shakes her. Seulgi doesn’t stop, letting her fall face down on the bed before maneuvering her boneless body, straddling one leg and propping another high against her shoulder. She rolls her hips forward in response to a keening sound, licking a wet stripe against the leg beside her head.

“Again.”

Something is alluring in the way Seulgi moves her body with minimal effort like she’s a ragdoll, that sends liquid heat straight to Joohyun’s bones, helpless to the onslaught of pleasure, and the pull of Seulgi’s dominance.

It’s in the third position, Joohyun dragged to the edge of the bed with Seulgi standing over her, thrusting like an animal from behind, when she gets it.

“You’re— _ah!_ —doing so well, Seulgi-ah.” She’s barely aware of what she’s saying but Seulgi’s doing something absolutely magical with two fingers on her clit that she’s barely coherent.

She hears a sob, realization settling in her brain slow because Seulgi gets more frantic, each thrust like she’s proving a point.

_She’s trying to make up for last time_.

“Unnie,” Seulgi whines, churning her hips softly as Joohyun cries out from another orgasm, moving them until they’re properly on the bed and face to face. “Say it again.”

Her hands wind against a sweaty back, pulling their bodies flush, skin on skin. “You’re doing me so good, baby.” The pet name elicits a sharp thrust, Joohyun’s mouth stuck in an _o_. “Wreck me so well that you’ll ruin other people for me.”

The implications of that sentence send Seulgi into a frenzy, mouthing possessively at Joohyun’s collarbones.

“Mine.”

“Yours, Seulgi-ah,” her toes curl, feeling the inescapable end of her pleasure as her orgasm rises again. “Only yours.”

It takes longer for Joohyun to catch her breath after that, swatting at a muscled abdomen when Seulgi continues to move her hips.

“No more, you beast,” she whines, reaching for the blanket on the farthest side of the bed. “I’m so sore you’ll probably have to use my mouth instead for the next couple of days.”

The promise seems to settle Seulgi, carefully removing the toy and wrapping it around a bunch of tissue paper on her bedside table to be cleaned later. She moves, heavier and warmer than a blanket, slotting herself in between Joohyun’s legs and automatically latches on a nipple, humming around it when Joohyun starts to stroke her hair.

Joohyun takes it in stride, finding humor in how after Seulgi messed her internal organs after countless orgasms then the younger girl finds comfort in suckling her breast. She’s like a child yet also Joohyun’s partner.

She presses a kiss against Seulgi’s forehead, can’t wait in moving forward together.

**::**

Joohyun was twenty-one, Seulgi was eighteen, and the first time they woke up in the same bed, Seulgi started crying.

“I’m sorry,” her voice is muffled under a wad of tissue, Joohyun still half-asleep as she tries to comfort her. “You can go back to sleep, I’ll be okay.”

And, well, that won’t do.

“No,” Joohyun insists, pulling the blanket up and trapping it beneath her armpits. “, you’re upset. Talk to me?”

Seulgi blows her nose, eyes puffy from both crying and just woken up. “I just… I got too cold and you’re hogging the blanket and then I remember what happened yesterday and—I just wanted this for a really long time, okay? And now you’re here and I just…I can’t believe this is real, honestly.”

It’s such an honest confession, gripping at Joohyun’s heart and squeezes like a hug. She leans forward, pressing a kiss against the tear tracks. “I’m here, Seulgi-ah. Good morning.” She opens her arms, humming when Seulgi doesn’t hesitate to wrap around her.

Seulgi speaks up after a few peaceful moments, Joohyun on the brink of falling asleep again.

“I, uh, I’m applying for your university. Seungwan said I have a pretty good chance, so.”

Warmth floods her like the morning light spilling inside Seulgi’s bedroom. “I’ll be waiting for you.”

**::**

Joohyun was twenty-one and Seulgi was eighteen when Joohyun found out that Seulgi cannot, for the life of her, be left in the kitchen alone.

“How do you mess up mixing pancake batter?”

“I wanted chocolate chips,” Seulgi defends weakly, staring forlornly as Joohyun scraps the batter.

Joohyun shakes her head, kissing a puffed-up cheek as she restarts the measurements. “It goes on when you cook it, babe. I’ll show you.”

And when they both end up with Joohyun spread on the kitchen counter with melted chocolate chips on various patches of her skin, well, at least it’s only the two of them eating the pancakes and no one else.

**::**

Seulgi is eighteen, Joohyun is twenty-one, and Joohyun attends their high school graduation both as Seulgi’s girlfriend and Seungwan’s older sister.

“So proud of you both,” she tells them, sandwiched in between the best friends and two arms around her waist.

“Thank you, unnie.” They both reply at the same time, grinning at each other with childish glee.

“Jinx!”

“Damn it!”

Joohyun laughs, heart full and surrounded with love.

**::**

**the end.**

**::**

thank you to my friend for this!

all mistakes are mine!

thank you, stay safe, and have a good one!


	2. :: sequel ::

**::**

sequel.

**::**

Seulgi was eighteen, Joohyun’s her girlfriend, and they haven’t had their first date yet.

Joohyun’s perfume still clings in her nose, lip gloss smeared on her lower lip, and her head’s lolled against the back of the couch, eyes a little dazed when Joohyun waves goodbye to Seungwan who’s pretend-gagging on the other side of the couch, the front door closing after Joohyun.

The car starts and she cranes her neck to watch from the living room window as Joohyun and Mrs. Bae drive away.

“Oh my god,” Seungwan groans, swatting at Seulgi’s arm to get her back to earth. “I forgot that you two dating means I get front row seats of your gross kisses.”

Seulgi scuffs her sock against the living room carpet, biting her lip. “Hey, uh, quick question.” she fiddles with her thumbs, focusing on the paused movie they left on the TV. “Does it count as dating if we haven’t had our first date yet?”

Silence.

It takes two seconds for Seungwan to catch up.

“I’m sorry, _what?_ ” She’s on her feet instantly, brandishing a couch pillow like a weapon.

“ _Ow!_ Hey, cut it!” Seulgi yelps, pressing herself against the other end and covering her head with an arm and a leg. Seungwan still keeps on smacking Seulgi repeatedly but the blows lose power as she goes.

“I can’t believe you,” Seungwan huffs, letting the pillow tumble from Seulgi’s head to the carpet. “Date first, bed later. I raised you better than that.”

“Raised me? I’m older than you,” Seulgi grumbles, reaching down to grab the pillow and place it in between them as a deterrent in case her best friend launches an attack again.

She gets an unimpressed glare. Seulgi looks away. Seungwan’s glare is getting too similar to Joohyun’s and it’s downright _terrifying_.

“So?” Seungwan pokes at her arm. “Got any plans or is this a _ball’s in your court_ thing?”

She thought about it, actually. Knows that a fancy dinner is out of the way because Seulgi’s _so_ close to buying a professional camera from her savings and splurging for one night seems reckless. Besides, she’s a firm believer that the cost doesn’t matter as long as they have a good time.

Her goal is for it to be a memorable first date. Not the best, but something Joohyun can look back fondly to.

“I was thinking of a picnic?”

Seungwan scrunches her nose. “Unnie hates being under the sun.”

“A _night_ picnic,” she gloats, smug that she already thought of that.

“Romantic.” Her best friend nods. “But you can’t cook to save your life.”

Seulgi grins, reaching over to wrap Seungwan in a tight, one-armed hug. “And that, my dear, is where you come in.” Before Seungwan can protest, Seulgi beats her to it. “I’ll do most of the work! Actual instructions instead of reading them might help me better!”

Spoiler: it didn’t.

Asking Joohyun was easy.

When she got back from the mall with her mom, Seulgi slithered inside the kitchen when Mrs. Bae pattered out to make a phone call and left Joohyun who’s busy washing fruits.

The sound of a music video drifting from the living room means that Seungwan probably changed it to not overhear anything and kind enough to not resume the show they’re watching, not without Seulgi. It also means she has Joohyun to herself for a few moments.

“Hey,” she whispers, dropping a kiss at the exposed skin of Joohyun’s shoulder, letting her lips linger, perfume clouding her mind for the second time that day. Her hands palm against the smooth fabric, circling until she’s pulling Joohyun flushed against her. “, can I ask you something?”

Joohyun’s body shakes with a burst of silent laughter, flicking specks of water behind her blindly. “That was a question.”

Seulgi pouts, knowing Joohyun can feel it pressed against her skin. “Humor me.”

“Okay, okay,” Joohyun turns in her arms, leaning her lower back against the sink, cold and damp hands holding onto Seulgi’s biceps. “What was the question?”

She wanted to joke, was sure there was something at the tip of her tongue. But now that Joohyun’s this close, close enough that Seulgi can count how many eyelashes kiss the top of her cheeks whenever she blinks, she momentarily forgets everything.

Even how to breathe.

“Go out with me,” she exhales, unable to resist Joohyun’s natural pull on her until she’s getting cross-eyed from how close they are.

“I thought we already are.” She doesn’t need to look at Joohyun’s lips to know that she’s smiling—her eyes say enough—but Seulgi still does. And what a mistake that was.

Joohyun’s lips are so close, pink and a little chapped at the corner but _so_ tempting.

She blinks hard, watches as Joohyun’s lips pull at a corner, and to her usual not-quite-smirk that just _melts_ Seulgi. Wants to slide down and sink her knees against the cold tiles of the kitchen floor and just worship Joohyun.

“I meant on a date,” she struggles to say out loud, distracted and tempted, breath already choppy. “First date.”

Seulgi licks her lips, watches as Joohyun tracks the movement, and _fuck,_ they are so not doing it inside the kitchen with Mrs. Bae on the tail-end of her phone call and Seungwan just a head-crane away from seeing them.

“Okay,” Joohyun agrees easily, now looking as affected as Seulgi feels, She clears her throat and curls her fists, pressing them against Seulgi’s sternum and pushing her away. The electricity between them fizzles out a bit with the distance and they breathe properly, feeling wrecked just in the presence of each other. Joohyun wags a finger in front of her face. “No kisses until the date.”

Seulgi shrugs, going along easy because at this point, after being in love with the older woman for _years_ , she’s at the point that she’ll do anything for her. Wants to.

“No kisses until tomorrow? Got it.”

Joohyun shakes her head, amused, and nods when Seulgi tells her that she’ll pick her up tomorrow night and to wear something comfortable.

Mrs. Bae heads back inside the kitchen and looks at the two of them, rolling her eyes fondly.

“Oh, to be young.”

Seulgi whisks Seungwan away from the Bae’s couch that afternoon, both on a mission to make Seulgi a passable sandwich-maker.

In the end, Seulgi managed to make three edible sandwiches, one of which was consumed by Seungwan and was deemed date-safe after they spent the entire afternoon tuned-in on Seungwan’s digestion to make sure she didn’t get sick.

Seulgi smiles, wrapping the food up in tiny little containers and putting them away safely for tomorrow night.

Everything was going according to plan.

**::**

Joohyun was twenty-one and it’s her first date where her family is just a _wall_ away.

“At least,” Joohyun voices out, smoothing out her skirt and eyes Seulgi warily. “, there’s a bit of privacy.”

She watches Seulgi's shoulders slump forward, head hanging, movements jerky as the younger woman sets up the table in the Bae’s patio. Seulgi refused to let her help with the setup, asking Joohyun to sit still while she arranged, a strained smile on her lips. At least the wind’s blowing from the front of the house so they’re safe from that.

“Fuck,” she hears Seulgi curse softly, the rapid rise and fall of her shoulders enough indication that she’s frustrated as she tries to light a candle only for it to be blown by the wind along with the other end of the table cloth and Joohyun’s seen enough.

“Seulgi-ah, that’s enough.”

Her sentence is punctuated by a flash of lightning in the sky and they wait for a boom of thunder but nothing comes. She pads her way towards the younger woman, resting her palms in between the tense muscle of tightly coiled shoulder blades. Seulgi relaxes with an exhale.

“It wasn’t supposed to rain,” Seulgi whispers, almost drowned out by the sound of the harsh rain around them but Joohyun hears it clearly. “I checked three different forecast websites and it’s supposed to be clear until next week.”

Joohyun bites a smile because _of course_ , Seulgi will triple-check the weather. She kisses a shoulder, hands on Seulgi’s hips as she turns her around.

“Rogue thunderstorm, it’s no one’s fault and no one knew,” Joohyun says, thumbing at Seulgi’s cheeks until she has a ridiculously dopey smile on her face. “Hi.”

“Hi,” Seulgi parrots, blinking slowly before exhaling slowly. “I’m sorry. I just wanted this to go well.” Her eyes glance behind Joohyun, at the closed living room curtain Seungwan shut earlier to give them a semblance of privacy before she thumbs at Joohyun’s bottom lip. “Want to be a good first date you’ll remember. You know, with stargazing and stuff.”

“You think I won’t remember this?” Joohyun’s smile is infectious enough that the last of Seulgi’s disappointment in the sudden change of plans seep out of her, turning her soft and plaint as Joohyun tugs her towards the daybed instead with their sandwiches. “Table cloth won’t stay still with this wind. Might as well cuddle.”

The cushions are soft and when Seulgi stretched her legs out, Joohyun _ooh_ ’d, settling in between and backing up until her back was flush with Seulgi’s front. There’s no blanket they can share but Seulgi shrugs off her jacket, still slightly damp from her walk to the Bae’s in the pouring rain, and drapes it over Joohyun’s skirt.

And it works, somehow.

The rain is a nice white noise, their breathings in sync, and with Joohyun in her arms like this?

Not everything went according to plan but she’s going to agree with Joohyun—it’ll be impossible to not remember this.

**::**

Seulgi was eighteen when she first got invited inside Mr. Bae’s home office.

They just got back inside the house, squealing when the wind changed and the patio no longer dry. Joohyun kissed her cheek, told her she’ll change out of her skirt.

“So gross,” Seungwan teases when she had to wave her hand in front of Seulgi to get her attention.

“Hey!” Seulgi huffs, indignant. “We’re not gross.”

“So are.”

“Not.”

“Glad to see you two never grew up,” a voice pipes in from behind them, Mr. Bae looking over the two of them with a fond expression. He sighs, heavy, the lines on his forehead more prominent than before. “Seulgi. I’d like to speak with you.”

He turns down the hallway, not waiting for Seulgi’s response. Seulgi slowly gets up from the couch, making rapid gestures with her hands and eyes wide, wordlessly communicating with her best friend. Seungwan just shrugs, as clueless as she is, and a frown on her face from her father’s behavior.

Seulgi knocks on the door despite it being left ajar. “Sir?” He’s leaning against his desk, wearing proper office-wear even though it’s a Sunday. His reading glasses are tucked in the front pocket of his shirt and he gestures for her to come in.

This is the first time she’s been invited inside, only catching glimpses of the inside from her years of practically living here during the weekends. The floor is carpeted all throughout, floor-to-ceiling shelves behind the desk imposing, and there’s a table on the wall opposite from the windows housing his coin collection. It smells like old books and aftershave; somewhat comforting her, reminding her that this is also the same man that makes them pancakes with bits of bacon on Saturday mornings.

He doesn’t sit nor does he have extra chairs so Seulgi stays by the door, leaning against it.

“Seulgi,” he starts, looking at the wallpaper beside her head. “, you’ve been… part of my family since you and Seungwan were little. I saw you grow up and I know how much you mean to Seungwan and now, Joohyun.”

“Oh,” she can’t help but slip out, sagging more against the door because _this is what it’s about_. She’s getting the dad talk.

“I’m… I’m glad that it’s you. That my daughter is dating.” He clears his throat, clearly uncomfortable, and Seulgi kind of wants to hug him and also cry at the same time. “I trust you, kid. And I just want to say that even if things between you and Joohyun don’t work out in the long run, I’ll still cook pancakes for you. Just ask.”

Seulgi couldn’t help it, tearing up a little but managed to rein in the impulse to hug him. She feels so _light_.

“Thank you, sir.”

He nods, Seulgi having half a mind to be relieved that he didn’t say something like _call me dad_ or something.

There’s an awkward moment of silence and understanding, Seulgi throwing her thumb behind her shoulder to indicate that she’ll be going. He nods, the tension in his jaw loosening some, and Seulgi’s halfway out the room when he calls for her again.

“One last thing. Just because I know you don’t mean the same rule doesn’t apply.” He’s now smiling at her, a little quirk of the corner of his mouth that’s not quite a smirk but Seulgi suddenly realized where Joohyun’s non-smirk came from. “As Joohyun’s girlfriend, open doors. Always. Unless you’re staying at Seungwan’s. Copy?”

She nods dumbly. “Noted, sir.”

Seulgi keeps her back to the hallway, quietly closing the door, and when she turns around, Seungwan’s at the corner of the hallway looking amused.

“ _Noted, sir_ ,” she mocks, rolling her eyes.

“Shut up,” Seulgi mutters, shaking her arms to get rid of the nervousness crawling under her skin ever since she stood up from the couch. “It’s your _dad_.”

Seungwan claps her back loudly. “Congrats, though! You’re officially dating my sister!”

They both cringe after the words leave Seungwan’s mouth, crinkling their nose at each other and making their way back towards the couch.

“Seulgi?” Mrs. Bae calls from the kitchen, smiling at her. “It’s still raining hard. Stay the night. You can borrow Seungwan’s clothes.”

Her best friend rolls her eyes but turns off the TV, making her way up the stairs and Seulgi follows. Joohyun’s just coming out of the bathroom, towel still slung around her neck, with a question in her eyes. 

“Here, I still have some of your clothes,” Seungwan hands her a shirt from their school as well as jersey shorts Seulgi was looking for weeks.

“Ah, this is where it’s been,” she thumbs at the fabric, waits for Seungwan to pick out her pajamas too before excusing herself to the bathroom to change.

“Seul?” She stops, squinting as she looks back at her best friend’s knowing smile. “I’ll sleep with my headphones on and if you’re going to sneak out tonight, close the door behind you.”

Joohyun’s bedroom door is open and has the full view when Seulgi marches out of her best friend’s bedroom with flaming cheeks. Seulgi shakes her head, makes a gesture that hopefully says _talk to you about it later_ , and changes in the bathroom.

**::**

Joohyun was twenty-one and she _never_ had sex on the first date.

“Shh,” Seulgi’s lips are right against her ear, breath hot and burning her inside that has Joohyun keening, grinding more insistently against the fingers playing inside of her sleep shorts. “You have to keep quiet, unnie.”

She nods, a little frantic, a whole lot desperate, and does her best to keep her noises in.

Getting air in when her breath stutters with every tight circle against her clit is harder than expected, Joohyun’s head going fuzzy at the edges. She swims in the darkness, hips pressed down against her bed with a strong forearm and Seulgi’s mouth is hot on her breasts, shirt tucked up against her armpits.

Joohyun comes as teeth bite down on her nipple that’s on the thin line of pleasure and pain, wet mess smeared against the inside of her thighs as she clamps tightly against Seulgi’s fingers, wanting to keep the burning sensation of her orgasm closer.

“Beautiful,” Seulgi smiles against her skin, laughing when Joohyun’s having trouble catching her breath and hips are still working against Seulgi’s fingers.

It’s a wonderful feeling, bursting in and out of pleasure, and when Joohyun finally comes to, she laughs quietly against her pillow, carding a hand against Seulgi’s head, warm and content when she feels the younger woman lap at the skin in between her breasts.

“Thank you for today,” she whispers, voice cracking at the end of the sentence and Seulgi gets up to hand her the glass of water on her nightstand.

“Anything for you,” Seulgi whispers, touch playing with a loose thread of Joohyun’s sleep shorts and they kiss until it becomes just a press of lips, falling asleep surrounded with each other.

It isn’t until the sun starts rising that Seulgi tiptoed out of Joohyun’s room and into Seungwan’s, keeping her mouth shut at her best friend’s sleepy, knowing grin. Seulgi pretends like nothing happened, even when Joohyun’s face is in a worrying shade of red during breakfast as Seulgi slips a hand against her thigh, firm and a reminder of their little secret.

Her fingers drag higher, towards the waistband of the sleep shorts that left faint indentations against Seulgi’s wrist. She presses against the fabric, hard enough to get Joohyun’s attention and they both know Seulgi’s pressing down on a mark she left.

_Mine_.

**::**

Seulgi was eighteen and Joohyun was twenty-one when they moved in together.

They’re both quiet, letting an awkward conversation with Joohyun’s— _their_ now, Seulgi supposes—neighbor simmer in the air in between them, the sound of Joohyun’s keys jingling together and their shoes thudding to the floor as they shuffle inside thickens the tension.

“So,” Seulgi awkwardly starts, a smile tugging on her lips as she takes note of the bear-shaped plate Joohyun deposits her keys into. “, that was weird.”

Joohyun opens the fridge, hums when no weird smell emanates from it, before plugging it in. She busies herself with carefully putting water bottles inside, a habit of hers that Seulgi connects with her choosing her words carefully.

“We’re not, though,” her voice is quiet and if it weren’t for Seulgi having her full attention on her girlfriend, she would’ve missed it. “Right?”

“We’re not.” Seulgi insists, slowly pulling Joohyun away to tug her in her arms, loose but enough to reassure the older woman that she’s _here_. “What if your— _our_ —neighbor thinks we’re moving too fast ‘cause we’re living together? It’s our relationship and what she said was _rude_.”

With each word, Seulgi can feel the tension on Joohyun’s shoulders lift, eyes a little watery when she looks up at Seulgi.

“Yeah,” she nods wetly, blinking back her tears. “We go at our own pace. I think we spent way too much time dancing around our feelings and there’s no use holding back when we’re both in this.” And as if she’s making sure, Joohyun pulls back on their embrace, hands cold against Seulgi’s forearms when she regards the younger woman at a small distance. “How about you, though? Are you okay with this? In this?”

Seulgi pulls her back in, shaking her head and laughing softly, inhales the smell of the Bae’s car freshener and Joohyun’s shampoo stuck on her girlfriend’s skin.

“Babe, I’m in this for the long run,” she presses a soft kiss against the closest sliver of skin she can find. “And no neighbor of ours will scare me from a decision we made on our own. I’ll fight her if I have to.”

It’s Joohyun’s turn to laugh, her body shaking with it. “Yeah, okay, don’t pick a fight with her, please? She makes good kimchi and gives me some every weekend.”

“Fuck, why didn’t you say earlier? I would’ve made a better first impression.”

Joohyun shakes her head. “I’ll make sure to butter you up to her the next time I see her.”

A phone rings, Seulgi scrambles to pick it up and apologizes to her parents for making them wait in the lobby with the rest of her stuff. Joohyun laughs, throws over her shoulder something about opening all the windows so she can start cleaning up while Seulgi brings her stuff up.

And while Seulgi’s tying her shoelaces, Joohyun haloed with Seoul’s mid-day sun through the living room windows, she can’t wait to make this a home for the both of them.

“Can we have sex in every room when we’re done cleaning?”

The look Joohyun gives her is enough for Seulgi to speed down the lobby, cheeks flaming and hopeful.

**::**

Joohyun just turned twenty-two when she realizes she’s in love with Seulgi.

She wakes up to a hangover and the proper feeling like she’s being cooked alive, hisses against the bright light. Cursing for forgetting to close the blinds the night before and feeling like there’s an alcohol-soaked cotton ball shoved inside her mouth.

Make that three.

Seulgi’s still dead to the world, a hand groping at Joohyun’s chest, mouth stuck against her collar, hair a mess after last night’s bout of sex and body so freakishly warm that has Joohyun wondering if her girlfriend’s a blanket and not a human.

Getting up is a horrible decision. The world sways from underneath her feet, barely able to keep in the bile rising up her throat, and when she’s steady enough to look for her glasses on the bedside table, she sees it.

It’s a bottle of water (already unsealed, no doubt opened by Seulgi), medicine, unsalted crackers, a chocolate bar, and a note.

_In case you wake up before me :D_

  * _S_



Something squeezes at Joohyun’s heart, warming her up from the inside and she’s _crying_.

“Hey,” Seulgi croaks out, voice sounding like she’s still asleep, naked and judging by the grimace on her face, her hangover’s not far off from the hell Joohyun's feeling. She crawls towards Joohyun’s side of the bed, immediately reaching and comforting her. “Shh, shh, I’m here, what happened? Are you hurt?”

Joohyun stares at her, _really_ stares, and Seulgi’s trying to sober up and wake up at the same time, pinching herself, attentive, and Joohyun thinks _oh my god, I think I love you_.

“What?”

Seulgi’s more awake this time, brows furrowed, staring at Joohyun’s lips like it’s the first time she’s seen them up this close. Joohyun has enough sense in her to down half a bottle of water, passing it to Seulgi as she opens the crackers and eats some of it too.

If she’s going to say that she loves Seulgi for the first time, she’d at least make an effort for her mouth to not smell like a bar’s sticky dance floor.

“I love you,” she gushed, timing it with Seulgi’s cheeks puffed up with the crackers, shushing her girlfriend when Seulgi starts swallowing the food hurriedly. “You don’t have to say it back. Not right now, at least. I’ve been thinking about it for a while and well, I saw your note and I _cried_. Then _you’re_ probably drunker than I was last night but you still managed to do this for me. And you woke up all worried, putting me first even though I know your head’s killing you too and I just—I’m human and you make it _so_ good to love you. Make it impossible not to. So, really, it’s okay if you—“

“I love you too.”

And it’s in the way Seulgi says it. Like a sandcastle crumbling under a wave, like it’s _inevitable_ , like her lips are sand and it can only take _so_ much effort to keep it standing under the weight of her feelings. It tells Joohyun that she’s thought of this before.

“How long?”

“I’ve been saying it to you while you were asleep for a couple of months now,” she confesses.

Joohyun melts.

She presses their foreheads together, overcome with _love_. “You can say it to me now. Awake.”

Seulgi’s eyes disappear in crescents, kissing the tip of Joohyun’s nose. “I love you.”

She beams, giving Seulgi a chaste kiss on the lips. “I love you too.”

**::**

Seulgi was nineteen and she saved up enough to spoil Joohyun for a fancy dinner.

It’s a proper one she’s been wanting to be able to give Joohyun ever since their first date, with dinner reservations, outfits that aren’t paired with jeans, and wine fancy enough that Seulgi feels a little drunk just by the whiff of it.

They’re giggly by the time dinner ends, and Joohyun admits she clenched her thighs together briefly when Seulgi confidently motioned for the check, looking every bit as fancy as the wine and the ambiance.

“Thank you,” she sighs, warm under Seulgi’s coat draped over her shoulders, snuggling tight as they wait for the light to change.

“Congrats on graduating,” Seulgi praises, the red light bouncing off of her skin, making her jaw look sharper and Joohyun’s having a ridiculous urge to mark her up right here on the sidewalk. “You deserve a night like this. Always.”

“If we have fancy dates every time, we’ll go broke soon.” She’s joking, clearly, but it’s only because she’s been looking at Seulgi’s jaw like a snack that she recognizes the self-conscious way her girlfriend’s muscles tighten when she’s getting a little insecure. “I liked tonight.”

“But?”

“But I also like it when we try new restaurants or have dinner standing up by a food cart,” Joohyun couldn’t resist, she kisses Seulgi’s skin lightly just as the light changes to green. “As long as it’s you I’m with, I love it. I love _you_.”

“Sorry, I got a little bit worked up back there.” They walk under the green light, Seulgi waiting for them to cross the street safely before she continues. “And I love you too. Always. I just want the best for you _but_ ,” she insisted, cutting off Joohyun’s already opened mouth. “I agree. It doesn’t matter as long as it’s with you.”

Joohyun nods, satisfied, and when they end up at an almost-closed milk tea shop wearing outfits like they came from a red carpet as the cashier gawks at them, her point is further solidified.

As long as it’s them, _together_ , that’s all that matters.

**::**

Joohyun was twenty-two when they celebrated their first anniversary.

Or Seulgi does.

“I am _so_ sorry,” Joohyun apologizes, heels barely off of her feet as she storms inside the apartment, bags of takeout from the burger place Seulgi likes making noise from being jostled. Seulgi’s leaning against the back of the couch, looking right at her with an unreadable expression from the low lighting, and Joohyun’s stomach sinks in further when she sees the cold dinner plated on the table. “Seulgi-ah,” she pleads, dropping her work bag and keys.

Seulgi just stares at her, before her shoulders slump with a sigh. The smile she gives Joohyun is shaky, eyes watery when she moves forward to take the food off Joohyun.

“It’s alright,” she sounds choked up and the guilt Joohyun feels is colder than the night breeze. “We can heat these up, no problem. I’ll put some in containers so you can take it for lunch tomorrow at work and—“

Joohyun catches her by the waist, pressing her face against Seulgi’s back. “I’m sorry.”

Seulgi turns, sets the bags down, and only when she’s swiping her thumbs against Joohyun’s cheeks does she realize that she’s crying. “Really, it’s alright. I know how hard your boss is working you right now and it’s just dinner, no big deal.”

“Our first anniversary dinner,” Joohyun reminds, willing her tears to go away so they can have a proper conversation.

“You’re here and it’s not midnight yet,” Seulgi ducks her head to catch Joohyun’s eyes who’s avoiding hers. “You change out of your clothes then we can eat on the couch. And if you’re up for it, I’m planning on eating you out for an hour straight and we pass out with a movie playing.”

Joohyun laughs despite herself, shaking her head at her girlfriend’s ridiculousness but grateful for the way she always manages to find the good even when she fucks up.

“Or I can _not_ change out of my clothes,” she drags a finger against the center of Seulgi’s chest, delighted with the way Seulgi’s eyes darken. “We both know how much you love it when I do this.” She pops the first three buttons of her blouse, giving a peek of her lace bra underneath.

“That can’t be work appropriate,” Seulgi quips weakly, taking a tremendous effort to keep her hands to herself.

“I wore it for _after_ work purposes,” she hints, pushing Seulgi out of the way. “Now go sit while I heat the food up. I can’t believe you waited for me, you must be starving.”

Seulgi’s halfway to the couch when she calls for Joohyun. “Does this mean yes for eating you out for an hour?”

“I took tomorrow off so yes to that,” Joohyun’s heart warms at the giddy way Seulgi’s eyes light up at the mention of a day off. God, she really has been working too much the past few weeks. “, and if you’re up for it,” she copies Seulgi’s words. “, I’ll do the same to you.”

Seulgi throws a fist in the air. “Anniversaries are the best!”

**::**

Seulgi was nineteen and—that’s the issue. Her age.

It starts with a phone call.

“Mm,” she groans, tightening her hold on Joohyun’s waist, miffed at being woken up at an ungodly hour after the night they had.

“I see, yes, thank you. I understand. Yes. Noted, sir.” Joohyun ends the phone call at that, carding her fingers once through Seulgi’s hair, not minding as it got stuck on a few knots, before plucking Seulgi’s fingers from her hip one by one.

“Where’re you going?” Seulgi squints, huffs when the clock reads 7:03 AM. Joohyun’s already halfway towards the closet, hangers bumping against each other as she picks out a blouse. The apologetic slant of her mouth tells enough. “You said you took today off.”

“I’m really sorry,” the bed dips as Joohyun sits by Seulgi’s side, her work attire neat by the foot of the bed. “, but that was my boss. They need me in today.”

This is a losing battle, Seulgi knows, so she just sighs and grabs Joohyun’s face.

“Stay safe, okay? And don’t skip meals today.”

Joohyun smiles, hands on Seulgi’s shoulder to press her firm against the mattress, kissing her properly. “I will, don’t worry.” A thumb caresses the side of Seulgi’s face and with yesterday’s exhaustion creeping up on her, she closes her eyes properly. “A few more years and you’ll understand too.”

And, well.

That one stings.

Seulgi doesn’t open her eyes, hears the shower run and she spends half an hour like that, just listening to Joohyun get ready, not moving when Joohyun gives her a goodbye kiss. Only when the front door closes does she fist the sheets, holding in her tears, and hating the feeling of realizing that somehow—no matter how small it is—there’s a part of Joohyun that sees her as a _kid_.

It sucks.

**::**

Seulgi was nineteen and decides to do something stupid.

It’s driven by the ugly feeling of insecurity, the _need_ to make that tiny part of Joohyun realize that she’s more than her age—and she’s stupid enough to do it in front of Seungwan.

Her best friend decided to visit, whining on the phone about how sophomore year sucks and she needs to bother someone else that’s not her roommate, Soojung. And the three of them are huddled around the TV watching a show when Seulgi decides to get snacks.

“Like anything, Wannie?”

“Popcorn if you have it, please.”

She nods. “You, Joohyun?”

The instinctive _unnie_ almost slips her tongue but she holds it in. And the room’s eerily quiet.

Seungwan’s looking at her like she’s grown another head. And Joohyun— 

Joohyun looks like a mix of confusion and incredulity.

“That’s unnie to you,” she states, one eyebrow raised, and shame sinks in Seulgi, cold and sticky and makes her hands sweat.

Seungwan looks at them back and forth. “Is something wrong?”

“Nothing,” Seulgi rushes out, just wants to get out of the situation as soon as she can. “Popcorn, right? Got it. Be right back.”

They don’t talk about it.

**::**

Joohyun was twenty-four and it feels like ages since she did something for Seulgi.

She’s haunted by this morning’s events: Seulgi fell asleep in the living room after a whole night of studying, their dishes from yesterday still sitting in the sink, and Joohyun can’t remember when was the last time the two of them _relaxed_.

It’s the last day of Seulgi’s finals and when lunchtime rolls around, Joohyun excuses herself from the office, heading straight to the store to buy overdue groceries and a bottle of wine she plans on thoroughly enjoying tonight.

Her arms are still aching from manually mixing the dough, their apartment smelling like cookies, and the new dish she’s pinned a few weeks ago from Pinterest is finally marinating in the fridge when Seulgi comes home.

“Unnie?” Joohyun worries for the three thuds she hears but it’s overtaken by happiness when Seulgi rounds the corner and looks absolutely _giddy_ to see Joohyun in her shirt and loose shorts, lounging on the couch with a show on. “It smells so good here. Hi,” she breathes out in a rush, softly holding Joohyun’s jaw as gives her a sinful kiss that has Joohyun aching at the heat of it.

“Hi,” Joohyun echoes, dazed, lips tingling. “I baked cookies.”

“I can smell that,” Seulgi’s eyes disappeared in the crescents Joohyun missed. “I thought this was the worst day ever and look at you, barely a minute and you already made it better.”

Joohyun pushes back Seulgi’s hair that came loose from her ponytail, twirling it around her finger. “Cuddle?”

“Give me two minutes, I’ll change into something I haven’t panicked-sweat during my exam.”

“Ew,” she throws a pillow after her girlfriend, feeling light already she hasn't even busted out the wine yet.

The egg timer on the counter says she still has five minutes before the first batch is done when Seulgi comes back from their bedroom. She slumps heavily on top of Joohyun, the tension in her body loosening.

“What are you doing?” Joohyun asks, looking down at her girlfriend who already has both hands underneath her shirt, distracting against the skin of her stomach.

“Nothing,” yet Seulgi pushes her body downwards, ducking her head and into Joohyun’s shirt. The older woman laughs, rolling her eyes, and whips her shirt over her head, landing ungracefully on an arm of the loveseat. Seulgi blinks. “Oh, well, that’s way better than I planned.”

“You planned this?”

Seulgi shrugs. “Two minutes ago.”

Joohyun has a quip at the tip of her tongue, she was sure of it, but all thoughts fly out the window when the heat of Seulgi’s mouth wrap around her nipple without preamble, softly sucking in a way that starts the flames in Joohyun’s belly.

It’s a usual occurrence, something that shouldn’t turn Joohyun on with how frequent it happens—when they’re asleep, when they take a hot bath together, when they’re just lying down on the couch—but it does anyway.

“Good job,” Joohyun sighs out, melting a little bit further against the cushions, making herself comfortable to be what Seulgi needs. “, was your finals hard?”

“Very,” Seulgi mumbles, not releasing Joohyun’s nipple and humming around it when the older woman starts playing with the end of her hair.

“But you did it. You’re done and you did so well, right, Seulgi-ah?”

A soft moan escapes Seulgi’s lips, Joohyun earns a soft bite that makes her hips jump, clit bumping against the hardness of Seulgi’s abdomen.

Joohyun stays like that, letting Seulgi get the comfort that she needs. They stay like that until the timer rings and it’s time for another batch of cookies to be baked. She lets Seulgi spoon the leftover dough, the younger woman’s skin still flush from Joohyun’s compliments, perfect with the orange haze of the setting sun flooding their apartment.

It’s their best night in weeks.

**::**

Seulgi was twenty-one when Joohyun brought her as a date to a company gala.

Her tie is stifling, Joohyun insisting on a particular knot that Seulgi’s not used to, but she smiles at it and plays the dutiful part of smiling as Joohyun rubs elbows with her co-workers, holding Joohyun’s drink and purse as the older woman gets dragged from her side by pictures.

Thousands upon _thousands_ of pictures.

It’s only when they start serving dinner that Seulgi finally breathes.

“Too tight?” Joohyun asks, eyeing Seulgi’s fingers as they try to loosen her tie and is struggling with it.

“Yeah,” Seulgi huffs, feeling self-conscious when a man with salt and pepper hair at their table gives her a glance. She whispers to Joohyun. “Sorry, can you help?”

“Let me just…”

“So,” the man booms, effectively breaking the small talk from different couples at their table, attention on him. “Bae, I don’t believe you’ve introduced your plus one.”

Seulgi fiddles with her thumbs underneath the table, nervous and wants to point out that Joohyun already introduced her but the man was too focused on harassing the waiter for getting the ice in his scotch wrong.

“This is my girlfriend, Kang Seulgi.” Joohyun’s hand smoothes over Seulgi’s slacks, taking a hand in hers and squeezes in comfort.

“Ah,” he intones, dry. “, what do you do, Seulgi-ssi? Can’t say I’m familiar with your name.”

Seulgi’s knees start bouncing lightly. “I’m still in college. Senior year this fall.”

“Major?”

_Why does this feel like an interrogation_ , Seulgi thinks, insecurities bubbling over the surface like the champagne she just had.

“Photography,” she clenches her jaw when he snorts lightly, as if it’s amusing, and Joohyun’s hand squeezes hers longer this time.

“Minor? Something in business, perhaps?”

The other pairs at their table watch the interaction like a highly interesting match of tennis, polite enough to keep to themselves but quiet enough to hear every word in the exchange.

“Painting, actually.”

This time, he does laugh, and Joohyun watches as Seulgi clenches her jaw tightly, helpless because technically he’s _her_ boss.

“Ah, truly interesting,” he bellows, eyes pitying as he takes a swig of his alcohol. “Now I understand why Joohyun-ssi does overtime so much.” He’s the only one laughing, words digging against Seulgi like a dull knife, bringing up issues she thought she already got over.

“Mr. Bom,” Joohyun starts, anger brewing because _now he’s gone too far_. “I think—“

“Yes, yes, truly an interesting pair you make,” he waves her off, gold rings on his fingers glinting and Seulgi almost rolls her eyes. “Joohyun-ssi, if you ever need anything,” Seulgi doesn’t like the look in his eyes. “, just come to my office, dear.”

He stands up then, the woman who’s undoubtedly younger than Seulgi that he brought as his plus one hastily following after him.

The air in the table is thick. It makes Seulgi want to head home.

“We can go if you want?” Joohyun whispers, softly tracing figure eights on Seulgi’s legs.

“No, no, I’m fine.”

“Really, we can just—”

“I said I’m fine,” Seulgi continues eating even though her appetite has left her ever since they got off the cab.

They don’t talk about it.

And when Joohyun comes home late for three days in a row, they don’t talk about that either.

“I’m sorry, it’s just… work,” Joohyun apologizes, body warm against Seulgi’s back and she’s weak so Seulgi pushes her until the older woman’s on her back and she’s once more resting against Joohyun’s chest, hand under her girlfriend’s shirt and ears pressed against the familiar beat of Joohyun’s heart.

“It’s alright.”

She wants to say a whole lot more, feeling like she’s on the verge of exploding, but she doesn’t.

They sleep.

**::**

Joohyun was twenty-four, Seulgi was twenty-one, and they exploded.

The air is cold in their apartment as soon as Joohyun comes home and she knows something’s wrong.

“Seulgi-ah?” The only light on is the one above the stove. Joohyun gropes the wall for the switch. “Oh my god!” She jumps, clutching at her chest. She spots Seulgi in the living room, sitting against the arm of the loveseat, unmoving. “I called for you, why didn’t you answer?”

The stare the younger woman gives her rubs Joohyun the wrong way so she busies herself in taking off her heels properly, bending down to massage at her ankles, an excuse to not meet Seulgi’s eyes.

She hears a sigh.

“I _called_ you,” her voice is hard, accusing, and Joohyun’s head snaps up at the anger in her girlfriend’s words. “Why didn’t you answer?”

“My phone died after lunch break and I had back to back meetings all afternoon.” She crosses her arms, the coldness of the air getting to her. She brushes it off.

Seulgi groans, frustrated, close to pulling her hair but stops to flail her arms wildly in the air instead. “You _agreed_ ,” she hisses, sweeping her arms to her side and Joohyun’s heart drops, finally noticing the equipment cluttered on one side of their living room. “You _agreed_ to take the afternoon off today. You _cried_ tears of joy when I asked if you can model for a project because you’re so _flattered_. And you forgot?!”

“Fuck,” Joohyun feels tears stinging behind her eyes, hating herself for forgetting. “Seulgi-ah, I am _so_ sorry I—I forgot and… and I had a reminder on my phone but it died so I—“

“You know what sucks? This is part of my graduation portfolio. It’s _that_ important, unnie.” Seulgi barks out a laugh, hollow, and it pierces through Joohyun’s lungs. “I kept pushing it back to fit _your_ schedule because even though I have a deadline, I know you have better things to do.”

Joohyun shakes her head, eyes blurry as tears trickle down her cheeks. “I didn’t… I should’ve been there. I should’ve just taken the day off, I’m so sorry. Please forgive me, I’ll make it up to you. Please.”

Seulgi shakes her head, cold. “I had help. It’s done. I don’t need you for it anymore.”

The statement deals the final blow for Joohyun but instead of apologizing— 

She explodes.

“You know what?” She mocks, wiping at her tears angrily. “I thought you’d be more understanding— that I’m doing my _job_. I’m paying for my own half of the rent and food but I _understand_ you don’t because you’re still a student. The crazy thing was—I thought you’d handle this more properly. That you’d understand me. Like an adult.”

She regrets the words as soon as they leave her mouth.

Seulgi looks so broken, red splotches on her face as she holds in her tears and Joohyun should’ve just kept her damn mouth shut.

“Seul I—that’s not—“

“No,” Seulgi shakes out, reaching for her phone and wallet on the coffee table. “You’ve said enough.”

The door isn’t slammed shut but the sound is like a hammer against Joohyun’s heart, breaking it and she sobs at the realization that— 

Seulgi left.

**::**

Joohyun was twenty-four and it’s the first night they’ve spent apart since they moved in together.

She barely slept, used to the feeling of Seulgi sleeping half on top of her, hands or mouth on her chest one way or another, and no amount of blanket and spray of Seulgi’s body spray can give her comfort.

“You look like shit,” Seungwan greets her in the morning, holding coffee and a bag of bagels.

“I feel like it too,” she answers, moving to hug her younger sister. She’s got her face buried against Seungwan’s shoulder, needing the support, when someone clears their throat.

“Hi, I’m Park Sooyoung,” she introduces, eyes firm and mouth turned down. “Nice to meet you.”

(Joohyun was twenty-four and it’s the first time she properly met Park Sooyoung.)

Nothing in her tone suggests that she means it but Joohyun stands taller like she just didn’t crumble to her little sister in front of a stranger--that her girlfriend dated, a dark part of her brain reminded her— and holds out her hand to shake.

“Bae Joohyun,” their hands are firm, sizing each other up. Seungwan rolls her eyes, muttering about setting the table and to not take too long or else the coffee will get cold. “I’ve heard… things about you.”

She meant for the pause to unnerve the younger woman but all she gets is a smirk. “Mm, you have no idea.” Sooyoung shoulders past Joohyun and slides into a seat like she was invited. Joohyun hates her already.

“I assume you know where Seulgi is?” She asks her little sister, trying her best not to react to Sooyoung’s scoff at the amount of sugar she poured in her coffee.

“Yes,” Seungwan tentatively agrees, eyeing both women warily like she’s afraid the two of them will vault over the table to strangle each other. With how irritated Joohyun is at the younger woman three minutes into meeting her, she’d say Seungwan’s fear is pretty valid. “And I got the gist of why she’s so upset.”

Seungwan is frowning. Joohyun hates that.

“No, no, that’s so not fair,” she whines, dropping her head against the table.

Sooyoung whispers and Joohyun catches Seungwan’s reply of _she hates it when she knows I’m disappointed in her._

“What’s not fair is what you said,” Sooyoung comments snidely, slowly stirring her coffee and Joohyun feels a nerve bulge out of her neck.

“I’m sorry but I think I missed the part where I should care about your opinion?” she hisses, glaring at Sooyoung.

The younger woman battles her with a stare down her nose. “What you did was stupid and petty,” she stands up abruptly, tall and imposing. “I don’t know what Seulgi-unnie sees in you since you’ve managed to piss me off before you opened your mouth—”

“Same,” Joohyun cuts in.

“—but she loves you. Heck, she _moved_ _in_ with you three months in a relationship. We dated for a year and she didn’t say _I love you_ once.” She breathes in, steels herself, and Joohyun has to remind herself and hold on to Seungwan’s statement that Sooyoung is in a completely healthy, long-term, and monogamous relationship with a distant cousin of theirs, Kim Yerim. “And if you fuck up the amount of love, trust, and respect she has for you, then it’s your fucking loss. Do better.”

She storms out, the door slamming this time, and Seungwan winces.

“I’m sorry about...her. Sooyoung has a flair for the dramatics but she always means well.”

For the second time, Joohyun bangs her head on the table. “Oh my god, she’s right.” she groans out, waves off Seungwan’s _say what now?_ “Where’s Seulgi? I need to apologize properly.”

“She’s been holding on to her phone since last night, was hoping you’d call.”

Joohyun curses, lists that as another thing to apologize for.

**::**

Seulgi was twenty-one, Joohyun was twenty-four, and they finally get their shit together. Again.

“Oh,” flowers are shoved in front of her face as she opens the front door, an arrangement with mostly yellow flowers that Seulgi remembers as the shade of the morning light in their bedroom when Joohyun said _I love you_ for the first time. “Thank you.”

Joohyun’s biting her lip, wringing her hands in front of her. “No problem.”

It’s awkward, both of them dancing around each other. The last of Seulgi’s anger was drained out of her the moment she hit the sidewalk, taking a cab to Seungwan’s dorm and crying _again_ when she can’t come inside because 1) she doesn’t live there and 2) she’s not a student.

Seulgi takes in Joohyun’s red-rimmed eyes, hair flat on her head, and the guilty hunch of her shoulders. She sets the flowers down.

“Come on, let’s talk.”

They’re not used to this much space in between them but figured it’s for the best. They sit with one leg tucked underneath them, staring at each other.

Seulgi starts.

“You hurt me,” Joohyun winces at that, already opening her mouth to apologize but Seulgi stops her. “, but that’s on me. It’s been...it’s something that’s been eating me up since we started dating. It was hard enough the first time for me to convince you to see me as something other than your little sister’s best friend. Or Seulgi, a younger kid from your neighborhood. And it just… people look at us and think they know what’s best for us. People assuming we’re moving to fast by moving in, how my degree is laughable compared to yours, and I _know_ that there’s a part of you that doesn’t see me as your equal—that I’m still a kid and you think I’m your responsibility so you work late hours to _pay_ for my shit.”

“Seul, that’s— “

“No, I know. Did you think I wouldn’t notice? That my paints never seem to deplete, that you always offer to pick up my prints and never take the cash I leave on the table? Look, I know you mean well but you don’t need to _provide_ for me and then hold it against me.” Seulgi catches her breath, heart constricting at the horrified look on Joohyun’s face. She softens. “For _years_ , I was so insecure and felt so little next to you, always felt that what I do isn’t enough because there’s another huge client you sealed a deal with. And if you’ve been home more and talking with me instead of working all night, you’ll _know_ about this.”

She didn’t mean to cry, but Seulgi is, ugly and collecting under her chin, dropping and staining the front of her sweatpants. Joohyun looks like she’s barely keeping it together, red lines harsh on the pale skin of her arms, blunt nails digging in as she holds in her hiccups, tears already threatening to spill over her eyes.

“I always try to do my best because being an adult sucks and even if people think what I’m doing with my life is useless, you never thought that. I want to come home after school, make you dinner, and _talk_. About life, about your work, about mine— _anything_. You make me feel validated after a crappy day and I kept my mouth shut because I’m scared that if I whine about everything, you’ll think you’re dating a _kid_.” Seulgi takes in a shaky breath, holding Joohyun’s wet hands that were harshly wiping her tears away. She aims for a smile, shaky at the edges. “Thank you for letting me talk, ‘m done now.”

Joohyun takes a while to center herself, the impact of Seulgi’s words shook her and she feels so _stupid_ for not saying anything soon. The tips of her fingers are numb from lack of oxygen. Joohyun closes her fists so hard it leaves angry crescent moons on her palms. She has half a mind to be reminded that it’s the same shape as Seulgi’s eyes when she smiles and _how long has it been since I made her smile?_

“I love you,” Joohyun croaks out, voice shot and choppy as sobs race along with her words. “So, so much. And I’m sorry for not seeing that something was wrong. I won’t justify what I did because even though I meant well, it didn’t translate well to you and what _you_ think is what matters. I was too caught up making grand gestures that I never asked if it was welcome. I’m _really_ , really sorry, Seulgi-ah. I… I suppose old habits die hard, but you _are_ my equal. I value what you say over other people but I may have slipped a few times and those are what stuck to you. You’re Kang Seulgi—my little sister’s best friend, a woman I grew up with, _and_ my partner.” She sniffles, Seulgi cracking a smile at their wrecked states, and feels nothing but love for the woman in front of her. “Let me make it up to you.”

**::**

Joohyun was twenty-four, Seulgi was twenty-one, and _making up_ for them somehow translates to sex.

It’s slow, tasting tear-tracks on cheeks as they pepper each other with kisses, and they’re not in a hurry to strip each other bare. Joohyun cried again when Seulgi worked off her bra, soothing the irritated skin under her breasts where the wire dug in; kissing the ache, kissing over her heart.

“I’m sorry,” she’s wrecked, accepting Seulgi’s love, pulling the younger woman impossibly closer by the shoulders, the weight of her finally back and the haunting of last night’s loneliness washes away from Joohyun as tears soak their pillow.

“I forgive you,” their skin slid against each other, Seulgi’s hips slotting in between Joohyun’s legs perfectly. Seulgi’s fingers are light, stare heavy, circling a knee cap before making a line towards the aching throb of Joohyun’s cunt. “I forgive you.”

It’s slow. Joohyun’s slick enough when Seulgi plays with her lips, smearing her slick from her entrance to make tight circles around her clit, then back down to her knees, then back up again. She’s shaking, willing her hips down onto the mattress as she takes it, tiny whimpers escaping her mouth when Seulgi decides to only touch the side of her clit altogether.

“Please,” she doesn’t know where to put her hands, ultimately tangling it around a pillow and pulling it against her face to keep her noises in when Seulgi starts licking a broad stripe along her cunt, the tip of her tongue snagging against her entrance with every pass that has her shivering.

“Don’t cover up,” Seulgi’s voice is gruff, looks half-drunk on the taste of Joohyun alone and the heat in her eyes and mouth has Joohyun’s hips lifting off the bed, grinding against soft lips without shame. Seulgi grins, absolutely feral. “Unnie wants it so bad?”

It’s a name she hears a lot, a name Seulgi uses all the time, but in this context, with the timbre of Seulgi’s voice, it does _a lot_ of things to Joohyun.

“Want it,” She humps the air, flinging the pillow violently to the side that it topples over the side of the bed, legs spread open lewdly and no doubt that Seulgi can see the way her entrance flutters at the word, desperate to cling onto something; to be filled. “, please, inside. I need you.”

A slap shocks her, soft but enough to startle her and for heat to bloom against the side of her thigh. “Greedy, aren’t you?” Seulgi sits up, her muscles bunching as she goes and Joohyun’s already willing to grind her hips upward against the hard plane of her girlfriend’s abdomen if she doesn’t get fucked any time soon. A thumb parts her lips, Joohyun’s tongue seeking the pad of it and sucking the finger down to the knuckle. Seulgi’s eyes darken. “I think you need to be put in your place. Don’t you think?”

Joohyun moans, vibrating around Seulgi’s finger. They’ve been dabbling on incorporating punishments when they’re both in a mood, Joohyun always ending up damn near passing out by the time Seulgi’s going through aftercare.

And she wants it.

Now that it’s on the table, Joohyun wants it so badly she just might _beg for it_.

“I’ll be good,” she whispers, nuzzling her cheek against Seulgi’s open palm, a wet stripe bumping her cheek. “Green.”

Seulgi nods once, gets up to reach under the bed where she keeps most of their toys. Joohyun tries to control her breathing, ignoring the way her body heats up at the familiar sound of Seulgi putting on the harness and slicking the silicone up. She starts counting inside her head, making it all the way to eight before the bed dips under Seulgi’s weight, caging her in with one palm planted at the side of her head, the other pumping at the shaft jutting from between her legs.

Joohyun jumps when the tip bumps against her clit, Seulgi shushing her and puts her whole weight on Joohyun as she slides in.

“Good,” Seulgi groans, pulling her head back just to see herself sinking inside of Joohyun, the obscene sound of her thigh knocking against the bottom of Joohyun’s makes her want to _take_.

“ _Oh my god_ ,” she drags her nails down the rippling skin of Seulgi’s back, settling on the younger woman’s ass as she lifts her hips off of the bed to take the toy impossibly deeper. “Want it all. Want it deeper.”

With both hands, Seulgi properly lifts Joohyun practically seated on her lap, schooching them up the bed until she has both palms holding on to the top of the bed frame and she _thrusts_.

Joohyun screams, scrambling for purchase against the sheets, the wind knocked out of her, and with every shout wrung out of her, Seulgi fucks her harder. The bed frame thuds softly against the wall, springs protesting at the movement, but it’s all drowned out as Joohyun sobs, mouth wet and open, eyes rolled to the back of her head.

“I’m going to wreck you,” Seulgi pants, words gruff as her body burns with the image of Joohyun going wild because of her. Their legs keep sliding against each other, the fine hair on Joohyun’s legs where her razor can’t reach when she shaves in the morning tickling Seulgi, reminding her of how intimately she knows this woman. Of how she’s— “ _Mine.”_

“Yes, _yes!_ Yours, fuck fuck _fuck—oh my god!_ ”

It’s a sensual give and take—the more Joohyun screams, the more ruthless Seulgi seems to become, amping up the punishing pace that she started with and Joohyun’s left to writhe in the sheets and take it.

Sudden and harsh, Joohyun silently screams when she’s overcome with immense pleasure, raising every hair in her body as she twists in the sheets, trying to trap Seulgi’s hips on a downstroke. She feels like a barrel of oil with a match suddenly dropped into its depths, burning and blinding. Seulgi’s lips barely leave any stretch of skin she can reach, circling her hips, grinding, to prolong Joohyun’s orgasm.

She’s barely coherent, still doesn’t know which side is up or down when Seulgi spreads her legs wide open for the nth time.

“Again.”

The sun’s almost setting by the time Seulgi lets up, unceremoniously leaving the toy at the foot of the bed to be cleaned up later, doesn’t bother to drag up the pillows and blankets strewn about and around the bed.

She crawls on top of Joohyun like a cat tired from playtime, Joohyun adjusting her back to be more comfortable as she opens her arms for her girlfriend. A hiss escapes her lips when Seulgi licks at her nipple, still sore from being pinched, pulled, and sucked on.

“Sorry,” the words are spoken against her sternum, soft.

“It’s okay,” Joohyun combs through Seulgi’s hair, getting a firm grip of the base of the younger woman’s skull as she motions her back to her chest. “Be gentle.”

Seulgi nods, fits the peak slowly into the heat of her mouth. She falls asleep to Joohyun gently tracing shapes along her back, exposed to the deep orange of the setting sun. Joohyun falls asleep with Seulgi’s weight on top of hers, solid and sure, _hers_.

**::**

Seulgi was twenty-two when she graduated from college.

Her graduation robe is draped carelessly on the backseat of Joohyun’s brand new car, Seulgi’s fingers attempting to loosen the knot of her tie, her other hand on Joohyun’s lap, holding her girlfriend’s hand.

“Still won’t tell me where we’re going?” she asks, poking at Joohyun’s thigh.

“Nope,” Joohyun replies, cheeky, popping the _p_ , tongue sticking out of her lips as she swerves smoothly into another lane, turning for the exit.

Seulgi shrugs, still high on _finally_ graduating. She leans back against the passenger seat, content, and watches the buildings fly past her. Their destination is Joohyun’s graduation gift for Seulgi but no matter how much she bribes, Joohyun’s lips are sealed shut, adamant on it being a surprise.

Joohyun pulls up in the parking lot of a commercial building, no lobby and she fishes out a set of keys for a door on the second floor.

“Holy,” Seulgi trails off, taking in the massive space. It looks rustic with the bricks jutting out from the walls, industrial pipes making a maze on the high ceiling, and the large windows allowing in a massive beam of sun that hits a stool in the middle _just_ right. “You rented this?”

_This_ being a studio, screens already put up around the lone stool in the middle, space sparse save for the large photo umbrellas set up.

Joohyun twirls the set of keys in a finger, sinfully devastating as she pops two buttons of her blouse open to reveal the familiar lace of lingerie set Seulgi was eyeing for her a couple of months ago, knows the maroon of it will bring out harsh contrasts against Joohyun’s pale skin and will look good in pictures.

“Congratulations on graduating.”

Is what Joohyun says but she didn’t expect for Seulgi to _actually_ set up her camera before taking the invitation. She was hoping for a bit of little action before the actual shoot, maybe leaving her plenty wet and wanting, the flashing lights will be the foreplay.

But _no_.

Seulgi’s taking her damn time adjusting the height of her tripod. For the third time.

_Desperate times call for desperate measures_ , Joohyun thinks darkly, stalking over her girlfriend.

She pushes Seulgi towards a bare kitchen island, ushering her to sit on the only other chair in the whole space that looks like it can handle the weight of two people. Seulgi stares at her with wide-eyes, don’t know where to put her eyes when all her brain can process is _lace_ and _Joohyun’s skin_ and _Joohyun’s skin on lace_.

Joohyun straddles her and Seulgi almost moans at the sight of her legs stretched open, the garter belts digging in against the meat of her thighs. She’s moving before Seulgi can palm at them, grinding against the soft fabric of Seulgi’s button-up, her silk tie trapped in between her and the sheer lace barely covering Joohyun’s cunt.

She watches as Joohyun grinds against her sensually, a wet smear darkening the lace and her tie makes her snap.

“Enough,” Seulgi huffs out, loosening her tie all the way, and pushes Joohyun off of her lap. She takes both thin wrists in one hand, Joohyun moaning at the effortless way Seulgi’s fingers circles around it completely, making a sloppy knot with enough wriggle room for Joohyun to adjust but not enough for her to get out of. “Sit in the middle.”

Seulgi slinks to the humming of a mini-fridge, delighted when she sees a bottle of fifteen-dollar unopened champagne along with a few apples and oranges. She holds up the bottle for Joohyun to see, uncuffing and rolling her sleeves the way Joohyun likes, and the bottle open. She gets her camera on the way to Joohyun, loving the knowing look the older woman has on her face.

The lace darkens further as Seulgi tips the bottle, bubbles sticking lewdly at the swell of Joohyun’s breasts. She also pours some on the top of Joohyun’s hair, slicking her girlfriend’s hair back and when Seulgi steps back to admire her work, she licks the champagne dripping down her wrist.

“Perfect.”

Joohyun already looks wrecked, bound behind her back, shoulders straining backward, the silk of Seulgi’s tie brushing against the rungs of the stool where both of her bare feet are resting, legs spread wide, and the trickle of the bubbles run towards the crease of where her thighs meet her hips.

The flash goes off.

Seulgi arranges her body like a ragdoll, the action sending bolts of lighting from Joohyun’s scalp and ends at her clit, leaving it pounding and heavy, swollen with how much she wants to be touched.

When Seulgi’s satisfied with a pose or an angle, she gives a reward.

First is undoing the front clasp of her bra, breasts spilling out and Seulgi is only human, sucking at the hardened nipples slick with the beverage, tasting the skin, and leaving the peaks wine red. The second is the tie. Joohyun moans, joint popping as she stretches her arms skyward, the flash goes off with her torso stretched. Next, she gets fucked.

It’s sticky, the coldness of the window against her chest contrasting greatly with the heat of Seulgi’s body behind hers. Her legs are spread wide when Seulgi kicks at the inside of her feet lightly, two fingers stretching her deliciously from behind and coaxing a shaking orgasm out of her.

When she’s spent, reclined against a sheet-covered chaise that escaped their eyes, hidden behind the screens, the flashes keep on snapping.

“I think you’ve got enough,” Joohyun drawls, stretching like a cat, a smile tugging on her lips at how pleasantly sore she feels.

Seulgi acquiesces, puts her camera down to snuggle with Joohyun as the city darkens.

“Thank you,” she whispers, content. “, I can’t… really, _thank you_.” Seulgi sighs then, pressing a soft soft _soft_ kiss on Joohyun’s lips, eyes twinkling with unshed tears. “I’m so lucky to have you. And I’m so thankful you want me too.”

Joohyun blinks slowly, can’t escape the way her throat closes up, overcome with emotions. “I’m lucky too,” she whispers, kisses Seulgi’s eyes just as a tear falls. “I love you. So much.”

Seulgi sags, molding against Joohyun _oh_ so perfectly that they don’t know where the other ends and another begins. “I love you too. So, so much.”

**::**

Joohyun was twenty-nine, Seulgi was twenty-six, and a flash went off.

“Stop it,” Joohyun whines around a smile, not really meaning it.

Seulgi leans against the counter beside her, putting the camera down for the time being. “Can’t help it. You look so pretty, Hyunnie.”

It’s been years since Seulgi first started using that nickname for her but it never fails to kick at Joohyun’s heart, jostling it around her ribcage until everything inside of her _knows_ it’s because of Seulgi.

“I’m literally just cooking,” she shakes her head, continues on stirring, but her legs brush against each other, suddenly shy with just putting on Seulgi’s shirt from last night and nothing else.

“Still,” Seulgi argues, moving close. She drops a kiss against Joohyun’s shoulder, bringing the camera up again.

The flash goes off, the diamond on Joohyun’s engagement ring glinting beautifully with it.

**::**

**the end.**

**::**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for being away for a while, I was careful not to burn myself out and took care of myself :D
> 
> thank you to my friend for this!
> 
> All mistakes are mine (or if there’s a case of smashed-in letters, that was my cat’s fault)
> 
> I may have projected a little bit too much in the angst of this one lmao
> 
> Not gonna lie, I had a hard time writing the angst because it hits a little bit too close to home
> 
> This is a gentle reminder that your worth as a person isn’t measured by how much money you make, by your degree, by your lack of, by your mental health, or by the pace in which you take on life. Take a breath, put on those horse side eye blinder/cover things, and focus on your lane.
> 
> Also, hello, how are you? Have you been treating yourself kindly? I was dealing with a lot of shit but Brooklyn Nine-Nine managed to pull out a few laughs from me and Violet Evergarden made me cry outside of my daily-crying schedule. Don’t forget to drink water and never watch Binging with Babish when you’re tucked in bed at 3AM.
> 
> Thank you, stay safe, and hope you have a good one!

**Author's Note:**

> **follow the link/s on my[ twitter ](https://twitter.com/rexwrites/status/1341058168483315712?s=20)for updates and if you want to be my friend! :D **


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